“I’ll tell you right now, the doors to the world of the wild Self are few but precious. If you have a deep scar, that is a door, if you have an old, old story, that is a door. If you love the sky and the water so much you almost cannot bear it, that is a door. If you yearn for a deeper life, a full life, a sane life, that is a door.”
Earthy new moon in Capricorn, wisdom sign of the ancient grandmothers. An annular ring of fire solar eclipse is also stirring things up. It may seem like dissonance and disconnections are “in your face.” Other people may push their own agenda regarding what’s best for you. Breathe deeply and hold your inner knowing close.
This is also a time for ancestral healing and clearing. Family rules, traditions and patterns may surface. Embrace the ones that fit for you and let the rest go.
Only you know what’s right for you. Honor and trust your own heart.
Today I gave up On healing my trauma I gave up On practicing the skills To become whole Today I gave up On evolving Into that ever elusive Better version of myself Today I submitted To the wound of love I stopped pointing at it Looking at it Soothing it Tweaking it Fixing it Finessing it Hiding it Polishing it I stopped this game of separation I crawled inside the wound And spread it open I decided to wear it like a gown I accepted my total and utter Failure To be anything else But me
She who reconciles the ill-matched threads of her life, and weaves them gratefully into a single cloth— it’s she who drives the loudmouths from the hall and clears it for a different celebration
where the one guest is you. In the softness of evening it’s you she receives.
You are the partner of her loneliness, the unspeaking center of her monologues. With each disclosure you encompass more and she stretches beyond what limits her, to hold you.
“You can waste a perfectly good life trying to meet the standards of someone who thinks you’re not good enough because they can’t understand who you are.”
“When winter comes to a woman’s soul, she withdraws into her inner self, her deepest spaces. She refuses all connection, refutes all arguments that she should engage in the world. She may say she is resting, but she is more than resting: She is creating a new universe within herself, examining and breaking old patterns, destroying what should not be revived, feeding in secret what needs to thrive.
Winter women are those who bring into the next cycle what should be saved. They are the deep conservators of knowledge and power. Not for nothing did ancient peoples honour the grandmother. In her calm deliberateness, she winters over our truth, she freezes out false-heartedness.
Look into her eyes, this winter woman. In their gray spaciousness you can see the future. Look out of your own winter eyes. You too can see the future.”