Tomorrow is the new Moon in the water sign of Cancer.
Dwell on nurturing yourself.
Gently water yourself and your dreams with love.
Find someone or something to open your heart to.
We can change our world just by opening our hearts.
Pause, Take A Breath & Remember
How AMAZING It Is To Be Alive Now!
“Let go or be dragged.”
I am a very willful and opinionated person. And in many ways, my tendency to know and speak my own mind has been a strength for me. No one has ever accused me of being a lemming and just going along with the crowd. 🙂
But my willful, opinionated nature is also my Achilles’ heel, a weakness that has gotten me into hot water again and again. I tend to question EVERY authority and every point of view that is different from my own! I have difficulty letting go of my way of seeing the world and making room for other opinions. And I tend to push away people who don’t hold my view of the world. So, the idea of allowing for different opinions and points of view can be a bit of a challenge for me.
Figuring out how to relax and allow may be one of my core “life issues” – an issue that I will struggle with and learn about my entire life. What do I mean by “Relax and Allow?” Being in Allowance means I don’t try to embrace or fight against people or experiences anymore. I can relax and allow events to be however they are WITHOUT feeling the need to accept or reject them. Accepting or rejecting things takes a ton of time and energy. And acceptance vs. rejection is such a polarized black and white way of approaching the world. It’s the view that everyone and everything is either right or wrong, good or bad. It’s actually just flip sides of the same coin.
Allowance takes me beyond holding rigid black and white opinions. Allowance is the third choice. And being in a state of allowance is so different from the polarized, right / wrong energy of accepting vs. rejecting. Allowance is a calm, open space of no judgment; a space where nothing need be labeled right or wrong, good or bad. Everyone and everything is just “allowed” to be however they are today. No need to agree or disagree with that person, just allow space for them to be different. No need to accept or reject that newscast predicting doom and gloom; just breathe and allow for many different ways of seeing the same events.
Being in allowance is like a revelation for me! The idea of just allowing the world outside of me to be however it is today – the idea that I do NOT have to align with it or push against things is a HUGE shift. Allowance shifts me out of agreeing or disagreeing with people and events. Being in allowance means that when a person has a different opinion than mine; I don’t have to fight to change their mind or push them away! I can just “allow” that their way of seeing the world is very different from mine.
Allowance is at the heart of the middle path that Buddha spoke of. It’s also the space of non-judgment that Christ preached about in many different sermons. And it’s the place Rumi wrote so eloquently about:
“Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.”
Here are a few mental tools to help you access and explore the open non-judgmental space of Allowance:
When your boss / mother / teen aged daughter / TV news anchor / neighbor shares their opinion with you and you feel yourself start to react and bristle, say to yourself,
“Interesting point of view that they have this point of view.”
Repeat it several times and feel yourself shift and calm down. You may even get to where you can smile about their interesting view!
Try this mental clearing:
What would it take for me to stop labeling everything in the world right vs. wrong, good vs. bad, loved vs. hated, wanted vs. not wanted? Every bit of heavy, yucky, sticky energy that brings up, unravel and destroy it now.
When you catch yourself arguing with someone and trying to change their mind, try the wonder question:
What else is possible here?
or, Interesting point of view that I have this point of view.
A love letter to my fellow therapists, doctors, nurses, healers
I know how much you want to help each client who comes to you. I know how hard you work and study to help them. I am right there with you; I have been a healer of one sort or another for over 25 years. I know how much you care for your clients and want to help them heal.
You love them and want to help. But what if you actually have very little control over whether your client improves and heals or not? What if your clients are in charge of what happens in each and every healing session, NOT you? And what if being a healer or therapist no longer meant you were supposed to have the answers, or know how to fix your clients’ problems? What if being a great healer / therapist / doctor does NOT involve dispensing advice and healing wisdom to the suffering masses like some kind of Healer Dear Abby?
How would embracing your lack of control change your healing practice?
Each client holds the keys to their own healing. Every client has their own answers – even if they don’t believe it yet! At best, you can be a helpful conduit or sounding board – someone who helps your clients find a new perspective on their personal journey of self-discovery and self-healing. At worst you will try to take charge and actually get in the way of their healing.
Stop and take a breath. Give yourself a moment to grasp the idea that you are NOT in charge and you CANNOT CONTROL if and when, much less how your client heals. Each client is responsible for whether they heal or not. Does this lack of control and responsibility for your clients’ healing fill you with relief or infuriate you?
No matter what you do or say, no matter how many classes you take or how good your therapy techniques are, your client will choose whether they heal or not. You don’t control that, they do. If one of your clients heals, it is NOT because you did an absolutely flawless massage, gave them the perfect pill or performed the best sphenoid release in the Midwest. It is not because you said just the right thing or executed a flawless lymphatic drainage routine. People have been healing from all kinds of illnesses and pains for thousands of years before your favorite drug or healing modality was even invented. And isn’t obsessing about technique how we healers handle our own discomfort with not knowing how to make everything all better for everyone? Honestly?
This idea of the client being responsible for their own healing probably bursts all your fantasies about “if I just get really good at the right and perfect technique, then my clients will heal.” In my experience, there is no silver healing bullet – so stop looking for the “perfect” therapy, the “perfect” medication or herbal remedy, the “perfect” modality. Besides, that search for the perfect healing tool will only make you feel like a failure over and over and over again.
Open to the possibility that you have never been in charge of anyone else’s healing and see what happens for you and your clients. Remember that it is their body, their mind, their emotional reactions that determine how much healing happens in each session with you. Each client comes to you with a unique set of issues and strengths. Each client will heal in their own unique and unpredictable ways. If you want predictable outcomes, give up healing work and become an engineer.
So, if you cannot control the outcome of healing sessions with your clients, why be a healer at all? What is the point? How can you help anyone?
Before you throw in the towel and completely give up healing work in despair, try a few radical healing acts in your sessions. Shift your focus and see what kind of healing magic is possible:
Each client who comes to you is on THEIR own personal healing journey, not yours. So, take a big breath, smile at your silliness and learn to let go of control. You never really had it anyway.
Love & Hugs
The only day that matters is today.
Find the joy in here and now.
Pause, Take A Breath & Remember
How AMAZING It Is To Be Alive Now!
Hello, Beautiful You! I hope you are enjoying June while it lasts. 🙂
Last week I found a gorgeous little gem of a Youtube video – it is Louie Schwartzberg’s TedTalk. Louie’s time lapse photography of the earth is so beautiful – it takes my breath away! And his message is simple yet profound; be grateful for today, there will NEVER be another day like today.
TED Talk On Gratitude: http://youtu.be/gXDMoiEkyuQ
“What if…” wonder questions help jar you out of “logical mind mode” and open you up to possibilities and choices you may be overlooking. Here are a few examples:
What if Life is all about creating more Joy?
What if you are capable of changing ANYTHING in your Life?
What if you truly do co-create your life? What do you choose to create today?
What if your subconscious mind is silently mucking up your life?
What if everything your parents ever taught you about the world was just and interesting point of view?
How Much Joy Can We Add to the World Today??
Anybody else watch Venus fly by between the Earth and Sun yesterday? In case you missed it, here is a photograph of her crossing the setting sun in France.
The Divine Feminine Venus made herself seen with a backlight provided by the Divine Masculine Sun energy. All in the sign of Gemini, AKA the great communicator. Ladies, if you are feeling the urge to stand up and express yourself, blame it on the transit of Venus!
How Does it Get Any Better Than This?
Today is officially the first day of Summer and the LONGEST Day of the year! A long day can seem like a blessing – or a curse, depending on how your day is going. Here are a few conscious tidbits to help you turn today into a blessing…
This Wonder Question is designed to remind you that you are an amazing, infinite, gorgeous being and jar you out of defining and aligning yourself with the negative, nasty yuck of the world that is stuck in your body-mind.
How many of your heavy, bad, negative thoughts and feelings are actually yours?
I have been using this “Who Does This %#@&! Belong To?” tool and discovered much to my dismay that VERY LITTLE of the negative crap that I’ve spent years trying to clear was actually mine in the first place!
So, If you’ve been struggling with a negative, painful issue for years, try using this tool. It is impossible to process negative yuck that isn’t even yours in the first place. So, until you realize that the yuck is NOT you and NOT your problem, it will stick to you like glue.
If you could see me now, I am jumping up and down with excitement and joy because this single wonder question has cleared so much %#@&! out of my system and freed up so much time and energy!
Use this question for a few days – every time you catch yourself feeling bad or thinking yucky, critical thoughts, just stop, take a breath and ask yourself, “Who does this %#@&! belong to?” If it’s not yours, ask the universe to release and return it to sender please.
Let me know what happens for you when you ask, “Who does this belong to?” 🙂
What if the point of Life is to Be Joy and Spread Joy?
Our beliefs become our thoughts…
Our thoughts become our words…
Our words become our actions…
Our actions become our habits…
Our habits become our values…
Our values become our destiny.
I intend to plant a seed in your mind today and encourage it to sprout. And today’s seed is… Change your mind, change your life.
What if I told you that your biggest block to health and happiness lies in the beliefs you hold; beliefs that shape your every thought and emotion; beliefs that define your every reaction to life? If you are open to the possibility that your beliefs are really that powerful, then read on…
Your beliefs can help you or hold you hostage. Do you realize that your chronic health issues are chronic and difficult to heal because an old belief or emotional pattern is probably getting in your way and keeping you stuck in pain and out of balance? I’ve witnessed this over and over in my healing practice; I will treat two clients of the same age and sex with the same physical issue, but only one of them will heal while the other stays stuck in pain and misery. Why? Because these two clients hold different beliefs about the world and how it works. They hold different beliefs about what kind of healing is possible for them. So one of them heals while the other stays stuck in pain.
Your perceptions and beliefs about the world create your reality. Your perceptions and beliefs can limit you and close off amazing options – or open doors for you and expand what’s possible in your life. Unfortunately, your core beliefs were put in place when you were a very young and vulnerable child. What that means is, some silly idea you formed at the age of 2 about life and how it works may still be pulling your strings and affecting your health and happiness years later when you are an adult. And if you had a traumatic childhood, just imagine what kind of crazy ideas are still mucking up your life today from deep within you!
In my healing practice and in my personal life, I have witnessed the effect people’s beliefs have on their health and happiness for years. And I have found shamanic techniques that can be used to shift beliefs and emotional patterns. No matter what you’ve been taught in the past, I am here to tell you that you truly can release those old outdated thoughts, emotional reactions and beliefs from your system. Yes, you can change your mind! And when you change your mind, you can change your entire life.
Change your Mind, Change your Life, Change your World.